Classic Fries

Sonic the Hedgehog 3: The Review

RJ45 — Sun, 24 Aug 2008 21:27:09 -0400

ITS BACK! Classic Fries has returned after taking the summer off for the Pop Culture/Blogs/Recipes consolidation project.

Now... for those who do not remember...

Every Saturday or Sunday, we will pull something from The Museum and reprint it for those to enjoy! This gives those a chance who never got a chance to read it the first time a second chance, since the Museum itself is so large and its hard for anyone to decide where to begin.

And we are returning with something from the 2D Gaming Central... a review of the classic video game, Sonic the Hedgehog 3!

Sonic the Hedgehog 3 for Sega Genesis - One of the All Time Greats

Daily Articles

Review of Royal Rumble 1992

RJ45 — Sat, 31 May 2008 01:53:07 -0400

We are back with Classic Fries! Every Saturday, we will pull something from The Museum and reprint it for those to enjoy! This gives those a chance who never got a chance to read it the first time a second chance, since the Museum itself is so large and its hard for anyone to decide where to begin.

In this week's edition, I am grabbing something from the never released WrestleReview project. I am grabbing a review of one of the greatest Pay-Per Views of all time, WWF Royal Rumble 1992! WOO!!

Royal Rumble 1992

Stats:
Date: January 19, 1992
City: Albany, NY
Arena: Knickerbocker Arena drawing 17,000
PPV Buy Rate: 1.8

Before the Review:

Before you watch this Pay-Per View, you might want to rent Supertape '92, and catch the Undertaker vs. Hulk Hogan match to see how everything folded together for this truly awesome Pay-Per View. This is the first card of many that showed that Hogan's popularity wasn't going to last forever. Now onto the review!

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A Poem For RJ45's Fiancee

RJ45 — Sat, 24 May 2008 01:59:16 -0400

TODAY: I AM GETTING MARRIED! YEEAAAHHH!!

In honor of the celebration, I am reposting a poem I wrote for my fiancee, Katie, as the 100th edition of the column A Day in the Life on the anniversary in which we became a couple. We have been together for 5 and a half happy years, and I am looking forward to spending the rest of my life with her.

-- A Day in the Life #100
-- Eight Crazy Nights - Night Eight --

I Remember
by RJ-45

The time I remember
is the month of December
the first moment that we met
was a time I will never forget

You told me your name was Katie,
I thought, "Wow, she's a beautiful lady"
that began year number one
and our lives had just begun
... ... ...
... ... ...
... ... ...
as time went on by
I wanted to become a better guy
because you stuck by my side
even when I had cried

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The Evolution of Shining Force

RJ45 — Sat, 17 May 2008 01:42:24 -0400

Today, we dip back into 2D Gaming Central where I did a reasonable well cover of one of my favorite gaming series of all time, Shining Force!

Evolution - The Evolution of the Shining Series August 4, 2003

What can I say about the Shining series? Back in the days when I purchased a Genesis instead of a SNES, Role Playing Games for me were few and far between. However, one game came by the name of Shining Force was featured on the Sega Channel. I decided to give it a shot. Four minutes into the game, and I was absolutely hooked. The game mesmerized me with the game's unique personality. A few weeks later, and I had completed the game. It has been almost ten years, and I am still a fan of the Shining series.

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Some Dumb Song Parodies

RJ45 — Sat, 10 May 2008 09:05:49 -0400

Something that was never posted (and probably for good reason) were some song parodies. These were attempts at parodying some songs. Today, I have collected them and posted them in this digest. Some of these songs are many years old, but you might enjoy them anyway (or not).

- "With Arms Wide Open" by Creed
- "So Far Away" by Staind
- The Goldfish Jingle

The Penis (Goldfish Jingle Parody)

here's our
jingle for the penis
those sucked and not teased, penis
the wholesome snack that smiles back until you bite their heads off
did you know they're made with real meat
even tho they look like willies
the snack that smiles back
penis

Daily Articles

Brief History of the Famicon Disk System

RJ45 — Sat, 03 May 2008 09:08:39 -0400

Today, we will, once again, be digging from the archives of 2D Gaming Central! Today, we are randomly taking a look at a another piece in video game history... The Famicon Disk System! Quite a rarity!

Enjoy!

The Famicom (Japan's NES) was doing very well in Japan. However, Nintendo felt very restricted with the Cartridge format. They felt there that producing cartridges became too expensive. Also at the time, a cartridge's storage capacity was very small.

Nintendo's answer was the Famicom Disk System. They used much cheaper floppy disks. These disks could store up to 68k of storage. At the time, this was much greater than the Famicom games released in 1984.

The gimmick behind the Famicom Disk System is that for only 500 yen, consumers could take their FDS-formatted Floppy Disks and download a game to the disk at the store through a Famicom Disk Writer.

At any time, they could change the game they had on the disk as long as the disk still worked. This allowed gamers to save their progress on the disk, as well.

Daily Articles

A Rant on the Department of Motor Vehicles

RJ45 — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 09:26:08 -0400

This week, we are going into the A Day in the Life archives and pulling out both a classic rant and classic story about going to the Department of Motor Vehicles. ENJOY!

A Day in the Life...this is the way I pray...

COMING SOMETIME NEXT YEAR...A Day in the Life - The Website

A Day in the Life #71 -- November 14, 2003

"How do you do it, make me feel like I do
How do you do it, its better than I ever knew" - "Stellar" by Incubus

Welcome everyone to another edition of A Day in the Life.

Okay...so I do have SOME material. It is more of a personal story mixed with my own take on everything. Enjoy: I Hate the Driver's Licence Bureau.

I Hate the DMV

Daily Articles

Brief History of the Arcades

RJ45 — Sat, 19 Apr 2008 09:10:01 -0400

Today, we will be digging from the archives of 2D Gaming Central! Today, we are randomly taking a look at a another piece in video game history... The Arcades. This brief, a little biased, and doesn't really cover the history all that much, but you still get an interesting read!

Enjoy!

Daily Articles

Brief History of the Atari 7800

RJ45 — Fri, 11 Apr 2008 17:35:23 -0400

Today, we will be digging from the archives of 2D Gaming Central! Today, we are randomly taking a look at a small piece in video game history... The Atari 7800... the relatively unknown console that was launched a bit after the video game market crash.

Enjoy!

Daily Articles

Top 10 Mario Games (as of 2003)

RJ45 — Sat, 05 Apr 2008 09:34:53 -0400

Today, we will be digging from the archives of 2D Gaming Central. I wrote this in 2003, so there has been about 500 Mario games since then, but it is an interesting look at some of the all-time classic Mario games.

Hello everybody, this is TruePsychoPhreak here with another edition of T.W.I.G. Last week I talked about how it all started for me on gaming. Since my first ever game was Mario, I thought I would cover "My Top 10 Favorite Mario Games." This is not an official list. This is just my personal opinions. This includes all 2D, 3D, spin-offs, or anything starring a character from the Mushroom Kingdom (eg. Luigi's Mansion). Cameos are not included. (e.g. Mike Tyson's Punch-Out!!) So enjoy this week's edition of Ten.

Top 10 Favorite Mario Games

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Wrestlemania X-Seven Review

RJ45 — Sat, 29 Mar 2008 09:12:25 -0400

Wrestlemania 24 is tomorrow! So, in honor of this extraordinary event, I will be digging into the "WrestleReview" archives (My failed to launch website featuring Wrestling PPV reviews). I will be posting the review of what I feel is the best Wrestlemania ever, Wrestlemania X-Seven (or Wrestlemania 17).

Enjoy! :-)

Wrestlemania X-Seven

Stats:
Date: April 1, 2001
City: Houston, TX
Arena: Astrodome drawing 67,925
PPV Buy Rate: Unreleased

Before the Review:

This is considered the to be one of the best Wrestlemanias ever. It did everything right, and it started the very successful heel turn of Austin. Everyone was "on" that night, as every match was above DUD, and there was 11 of them! If you haven't seen this yet, get it!

All match final ratings are based not only on workrate, but crowd involvement, entertainment value, and finish. They are all out of 5 stars.

Doing play-by-play is Jim Ross, and Paul Heyman is doing "colour commentary" for the night.

Match 1. Intercontinental Title: Chris Jericho vs. William Regal

It all started when William Regal debuted on Raw. He interrupted Regal's promo, asking to "shut the hell up". He then did it again one week on Raw, besmirching Regal even more. Mind games continued, as Jericho then proceeded to "soil" Regal's tea. It all led up to this match.

This match was good, but too short. It turned out that Jericho landed on his ankle the wrong way and they had to end the match right there. It was still a good match, and if it went a couple of more minutes, it would have gotten the full 3 stars from me. The match ends when Jericho gets the Lionsault on Regal for the pin. (7:08) Great way to open up Wrestlemania.

MATCH RATING: **3/4

Daily Articles

Have You Ever Wondered?

RJ45 — Sat, 22 Mar 2008 09:20:15 -0400

Today, I post one of the series of rants I had when I first started out with in A Day in the Life column. The series is called "Have You Ever Wondered?"

Basic stuff, but still decent enough.

A Day in the Life #6 - December 11, 2002

Welcome everybody, readers, to another totally reeking of awesomeness edition of A Day in the Life. I am your host for the time being, Richie Jackson. Ladies and Gentlemen, let me enlighten you, as I continue my journey through my new life with you, the readers.

Today's edition will be "Have You Ever Wondered?" Enjoy!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I have a good question for you...Have Your Ever Wondered? Sometimes, we just wonder things by ourselves, but never actually express what we are wondering. That is why it is my job to finally say these things that are on our mind.

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The Original True Psycho Phreak Products #1

RJ45 — Sat, 15 Mar 2008 09:12:09 -0400

The Original True Psycho Phreak Products

True Psycho Phreak Products, for years, has been WYLFWT's platform for having satirical advertisements for fake products and services.

#98 May 20, 1999: The BOX

TPPP (True Psycho Phreak Products), your creative marketing geniuses have put yet another product to the public. It’s a BOX! Not just any box, you can put stuff in this box. ALL KINDS OF STUFF! Books, magazines, clothes, toilet paper, action figures, fingernails, and even Pringle’s Chips. I mean, you can find just about 550 uses for the BOX! So get your BOX today, 7 dollars for each BOX!

Daily Articles

Classic Rants #4

RJ45 — Sat, 08 Mar 2008 09:22:59 -0500

Today we are continuing a series of "Classic Rants" featuring some highlights (and lowlights) from the original Would You Like Fries With That? column! Enjoy!

#222 - 09.22.1999: Computer Error Messages:

Now is it just me? Or is there any possible way you can understand THE ERROR MESSAGE ON YOUR COMPUTER?! I always get error messages on the computers at school, and sometimes on my own...AND I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT ON EARTH THEY ARE SAYING! I mean...can't computers just spell it out in PLAIN ENGLISH on what they mean. But NNOOOO! We get "Invalid Page Fault", and then about 300 different numbers after that! Now...I have one question...WHAT ON EARTH DOES THAT MEAN?! My printer only has 5 seconds to live?! TELL ME! INSTEAD OF MAKING ME GO CRAZY AND NEVER FIGURE OUT WHAT IT MEANS! It's a mystery to the normal everyday computer users...that's for sure...

Daily Articles

Classic Rants #3

RJ45 — Sat, 01 Mar 2008 00:10:43 -0500

Today we are continuing a series of "Classic Rants" featuring some highlights (and lowlights) from the original Would You Like Fries With That? column! Enjoy!

#543 March 27, 2002: Go Ask Your Mother & Suicide Bombers
Guys ask each other when they become fathers “What the hell am I suppose to do? I don’t know anything about kids.” So I got to some serious thinking, in the future I hope to be a father, and I think I’ve unlocked the secret of being a parent. Guys, you only truly need to remember ONE SENTENCE! JUST ONE SENTENCE! Once you learn it, the years will just fly by, and it will be much easier than you think. Here it is:

“I don’t know, go ask your mother.”

Once you have figured this out, being a father will be MUCH EASIER than you thought it would be. So take my advice to heart men.

Daily Articles

Classic Rants #2

RJ45 — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 01:06:57 -0500

Today we are continuing a series of "Classic Rants" featuring some highlights (and lowlights) from the original Would You Like Fries With That? column! Enjoy!

#466 June 13, 2001: Morning Radio

You know what I find absolutely annoying? MORNING RADIO TALK SHOWS! THEY ALL SUCK MAJOR GOAT NUTS! When I wake up in the morning, I don’t want to hear the pre-recorded laughter of Bob and Tom, the true disaster that is Lytle and Lamb’s “Morning Disaster”, or Howard Stern proving he has the mentality of someone of the age of 14...HE ACTS LIKE HE’S NEVER SEEN A NAKED WOMAN IN YOUR LIFE! These shows are NOT FUNNY, they are just stupid. I think they should just be put out of their misery once and for all. I just thank the gods everyday that 99x plays MUSIC in the morning (what a concept).

Daily Articles

Classic Rants #1

RJ45 — Sat, 16 Feb 2008 09:21:29 -0500

Today we are beginning a series of "Classic Rants" featuring some highlights (and lowlights) from the original Would You Like Fries With That? column! Enjoy!

#349 Jan 25, 2000: The Possessed Broom!

You know what I’ve been thinking? I am wondering if a Broom just came alive...what on Earth would it do? Would it just sweep everything in site? Would it try to have a normal life like us human beings? Would it use the restroom? Would it have to wash it’s thingies at the end once it gets really dirty? I mean...what would a broom do it if was alive? Seriously...it’s a question I think we should all really ponder, cause this is really bothering me.

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Condoms, AIDS, Ribbons, Valentine's Day Snack Cakes, and President's Day

RJ45 — Sat, 09 Feb 2008 00:41:54 -0500

I don't know how I managed to time this one right, but here are some musings about the following random topics I somehow connected to each other:

- Hotels & Condoms
- AIDS
- Ribbons
- Holiday Themed Products
- President's Day

Enjoy!

A Day in the Life

…let me enlighten you, this is the way I pray…

February 17, 2004

#82 – “Complete and Utter Randomness”

“We are bringing this tape down to a whole new generation of nerds,” – 5iN from The Opening Promo of Would You Like Fries With That? – The Next Generation

I’m BACK…and better than ever! Well, at the very least, I am back. It feels great. I thank everyone for their support. I also want to wish a reader a Happy 20th Birthday. I wish 5iN a Happy Birthday.

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Internet Rants of Yesteryear 2

RJ45 — Sat, 02 Feb 2008 00:40:54 -0500

I wrote these random rants about the internet 4 1/2 years ago, but some of it STILL applies to today. One will be slightly ironic to our loyal readers considering what this page had for the first 2 years. The stuff that doesn't apply to today I guess we can nostalgic about... if there is a such thing as being nostalgic about something that happened less than half a decade ago, but here we go, anyway!

This is part 2!

A Day in the Life...Let me enlighten you, this is the way I pray.

A Day in the Life #35 -- April 10, 2003

Welcome to another edition of A Day in the Life. How is everyone out there? I'm just chilling listening to Disturbed's "Prayer" for about the 26th time. (Which isn't an exaggeration.)

Anyways, today's edition has a great theme for it, and I think you will ALL enjoy it. Have fun!

Daily Articles

NVIATWS: Naked Vickie In A Temple With a Sword

brynna — Sat, 26 Jan 2008 00:04:53 -0500

This week, we are pulling something once again from RJ-NET.BLOG archives by Brynna talking about creativity and putting in some effort into it instead of "Insta-Art."

Wednesday October 6, 2004: NVIATWS

I'm a 3-D Graphics Artist, mostly in the Hobbiest arena. My favorite program for creating graphics is Curious Labs' Poser, along with Adobe Photoshop for post work. Poser is a popular program, mostly because it allows anyone with a mouse to click, point, render, presto! a figure is created, a work of art is on the screen!

Well, sorta.

Go to http://www.renderosity.com/, sign up for a free account (no spam, no spyware), and browse around the Poser galleries a bit. From the very good to the very horrible, it's there, in living, blazing color, black and white, whatever.

Daily Articles

Dumb Warning Labels

RJ45 — Sat, 19 Jan 2008 00:25:52 -0500

Today we are going over an oldie but a goodie... Dumb Warning Labels!

A Day in the Life #14 -- January 13, 2003

Welcome one, welcome all to my life, A Day in the Life. I am here once again to entertain and enlighten.

Thanks for the awesome feedback on my last newsletter guys, keep it coming. The more feedback, the better and more motivated I become when writing this newsletter for you.

Enjoy today's "Dumb Label Warnings"!

Once again, I hope I am not "beating a dead horse" when I say that fact is much funnier than fiction. Let us face it, it is. So today I will talk about true warnings that are on labels. So I tell you to enjoy today's...

DUMB WARNING LABELS

1. The product: Microsoft Flight Simulator 2000

The label: Warning! This program should not be used as flight training! Death or serious injury could result!

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THE "S" IN ILLINOIS LAW

RJ45 — Sat, 12 Jan 2008 00:39:17 -0500

Today we are going with something that is probably only going to be funny to people in Illinois, but hey...

THE "S" IN ILLINOIS LAW

11.08.2004.1 - ILLINOIS - THE STATE OF ILLINOIS WAS FOUND OVER A CENTURY AGO. SINCE THEN, THERE HAS BEEN A COMMON MISCONCEPTION ABOUT ITS NAME. EVERYONE IN THAT LIVES IN THAT STATE PRONOUNCES ILLINOIS AS "ill-i-noy."

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News Stories That Give Society a Reality Check

RJ45 — Mon, 07 Jan 2008 00:22:02 -0500

However, RJ45's fiance has been on vacation so he's been spending his time with her and didn't have time to weeding through the archives to find something, and Sunday was the 6th which is WYLFWT day, so Classic Fries is here on Monday!

This week, we go through some weird news commentary in the first and only edition of "You're Kidding Me!"

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The New Year: So bad, its good?

RJ45 — Sat, 29 Dec 2007 00:22:31 -0500

(Classic Fries #51)

I went through just about everything I've ever posted in the years 1999 to 2004 in The Museum and, well, most of it sucked or was just not worth posting here on the Main Blow. However, I picked the best of the worst, and what I got was this mess. A CATASTROPHE, if you will, of epic proportions.

If you like reading something someone who was on a manic high on the manic-depression scale, you will love this. It makes no sense now. It made no sense then. I had a "Soap Opera" storyline in the daily column. God help us...this was posted on January 1, 2000.

Would You Like Fries With That? - Cause It's Our Time!

(Warning: Today...the millennium hasn't officially began...but in one year it will. And Y2K is another 48 or so years off!)

::The Richster is still in rafters if anybody cares...::

::"What Does Everybody Want?" is overheard!::

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I <3 Christmas

RJ45 — Sat, 22 Dec 2007 00:28:05 -0500

(Classic Fries #50)

This is kind of a landmark edition. This is the 50th edition of Classic Fries AND its the Classic Fries right before Christmas. So, I am going into those archives and pulling out an old thing I did about Christmas a few years ago! Have fun! :-)

A Day in the Life
...because I found a way to steal the sun from the sky...
January 2, 2004
#79 – “I Love Christmas”

“I think highways should have a beer lane.” – George Carlin

Welcome everyone to the 2nd edition of A Day in the Life for the wonderful year of 2004. I hope you are all enjoying the changes to the mailing list. If you don’t, or want to compliment, then your feedback is definitely appreciated.

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Complete Randomness

RJ45 — Sun, 16 Dec 2007 00:34:39 -0500

(Classic Fries #47)

We are back with Classic Fries! Every Saturday, we will pull something from The Museum and reprint it for those to enjoy! However, yesterday we delayed Classic Fries to get the shoutbox archive up since we are trying on new shoutboxes. So, we get our weekly dose on Sunday!

There was a series a mini-bits on RJ-NET.BLOG towards the end of its run... so here we go!

"No Time Like the Present"

I went to the Doctor's Office the other week for the blood test from hell (another story entirely). While I was there, I saw this sign that said, "Please refrain from using your cell phone."

I think it is a bit sad that they now deem it necessary to hang this sign in the doctor's office. It seems as if we live in this "No time like the present" world with our cell phones, iPods, and DSL hookups. However, when did we advance ourselves to the point where we need to peal that cell phone from some jerkoff's ear so the doctor can say, "Please turn your head and cough?"

Cut the Crap!

HUMAN CODE

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News Predictions for the Year 2004

RJ45 — Sat, 08 Dec 2007 00:16:31 -0500

(Classic Fries #48)

Today is December 8th. What is the significance of December the 8th? It is Katie & RJ45's 5 Year Anniversary! So, looking back on the "What was posted on December 8th" archives, I found this little old gem of mine. Every year, I run my own "Predictions." This one is for the year 2004. Here's the odd thing. A lot of this shit came true. Maybe not in the year 2004, but a lot of it came true, which kind of creeps me out, but hey...

So, originally posted on December 8, 2003, here is "A Day in the Life: RJ45's Patent News Predictions for 2004."

A Day in the Life...Once I cry, now I wipe away the tears...

Today, I am going to kick off the 2nd year in A Day in the Life with News Predictions for the Year 2004. HELL YEAH!

Enjoy!

PREDICTIONS FOR THE WORLD NEWS 2004

January 2 - NEWS FLASH!!! It is rumored that Michael Jackson has molested young boys.

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Easily Entertained

RJ45 — Sun, 02 Dec 2007 00:19:13 -0500

(Classic Fries #46)

We are back with Classic Fries! Every Saturday, we will pull something from The Museum and reprint it for those to enjoy! However, yesterday we delayed Classic Fries to recognize World AIDS Day. So, we get our weekly dose on Sunday!

This column gives those a chance who never got a chance to read it the first time a second chance, since the Museum itself is so large and its hard for anyone to decide where to begin.

I have written some material that never made the light of day over the years. This is one I wrote in 2004 that I just didn't post anywhere for unknown reasons.

I think this one was from the ...And Your Point Being? writing sessions where I started to take on a little bit on the approach I take today when writing. Those days were some of my best pre-WYLFWT.com writing, so I am not sure why I didn't post it.

This is a bit of how easily entertained I am!

Richie’s Rant #2:

EASILY ENTERTAINED

Daily Articles

Sonic CD: The Review

RJ45 — Sat, 24 Nov 2007 00:06:24 -0500

(Classic Fries #46)

Back in the day, I somehow decided that running a website about 2D games, would be a great idea. This website that bombed worse than Vanilla Ice’s comeback. Anyway, what is in this section came from my megalomaniacal website dedicated to all video games that were two-dimensional. Of course, since that covers at least 20,000 video games, it was hard to stay on one topic. Thank goodness I do not game anymore.

However, one of my last ditch efforts was doing a combination of gaming reviews and my humor. It KIND of worked out, but it could had been so much better.

Sonic CD for Sega CD - A Unique Sonic Title

Daily Articles

The Number Three SOCOM Player In The World

RJ45 — Sat, 17 Nov 2007 00:09:46 -0500

(Classic Fries #45)

Back in 2004, during the days of RJ-NET.BLOG, I had started my job as a tech support rep. I had some pretty unbelievable stories of stupidity. THIS IS ONE OF THEM!

RJ's Cup of Blog - Call Center Tales

Hey guys, RJ-45 here again servin' you all up with another Cup of Blog.

Today I get to share with you a tale from my job. I work for a Cable Company ISP's tech support line. Yup, I'm the guy who says, "Can you be at your house 3 weeks from now from 8 in the morning to 8 in the evening" or "It is your equipment, there's nothing wrong here, contact India."

But I love my job, and I love helping people over the phone. I love it when I get someone online. It makes me feel SMORT! Err...SMART!

I can tell you right now....if you get a billion pop-ups, visit http://www.spywareinfo.com and download Ad-Aware.

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Internet Rants of Yesteryear

RJ45 — Sat, 10 Nov 2007 00:10:44 -0500

(Classic Fries #44)
We are back with Classic Fries! Every Saturday, we will pull something from The Museum and reprint it for those to enjoy! This gives those a chance who never got a chance to read it the first time a second chance, since the Museum itself is so large and its hard for anyone to decide where to begin.

A Day in the Life...Let me enlighten you, this is the way I pray.

A Day in the Life #36 -- April 13, 2003

Well, after the surprising response from the last edition of the newsletter, I am going to do a sequel of sorts. I can't believe the response I got, it was amazing. Keep sending in those feedback people. Without it, I wouldn't be as motivated. Thank you!

So today is Internet 2. Enjoy!

Internet 2 - If Download Doesn't Start, Click Here.

There are so many things that bother me about the internet, being a big person who uses it when never I get the opportunity. One thing that really gets on my nerves is...ADVERTISING.

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Call Center Tales: Crossing the Line into Insanity

brynna — Sat, 03 Nov 2007 01:11:01 -0400

(Classic Fries #42)
We are back with Classic Fries! Every Saturday, we will pull something from The Museum and reprint it for those to enjoy! This gives those a chance who never got a chance to read it the first time a second chance, since the Museum itself is so large and its hard for anyone to decide where to begin.

This week we go to Brynna where she has some great tech support rants!

Wednesday, November 10, 2004 Brynna's Tales From a Call Center - Crossing the Line into Insanity

RJ-45, The Pick and I work in the same call center.

Dwell on that a moment.

Imagine the implications.

Imagine the private messaging between us all ... one of my favorites being: "I have Norman Bates on the phone."

Imagine the phone muting, the swearing and smart-ass comments about clueless customers.

Also realize that not nearly all of those comments come from just us three. Imagine during peak times about fifty people slowly, but surely, coming unglued.

The next two calls happen almost daily, in varying forms, as follows:

Daily Articles

People Just Don't Have Common Sense

RJ45 — Sat, 27 Oct 2007 02:18:26 -0400

(Classic Fries #42)

This week we are dipping one more time into the And Your Point Being? archives to pull this interesting rant on people and common sense!

… And Your Point Being?

#3 June 3, 2004 – “Common Sense”

by RJ45

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Classic Fries #41: Super-Teddy: The Last Cub of Krypton

RJ45 — Sat, 20 Oct 2007 01:00:00 -0400

This week we are not going to be using something from The Museum. Instead, this was an extra from an article I wrote over a year ago about my vacation to Chicago. VIEW THAT HERE

I made a gift for my fiance and was nerdy enough to create a backstory about it for her in my own geeky way of being cute. THIS is the story! :-)

Enjoy!

The Legend of Super-Teddy

The Last Cub of Krypton

Griz-El, pet bear of Jor-El, was packed in with Kal-El before shot out into pace towards Planet Earth. Unfortunately, Griz-El immediately ran away after the space ship landed so many years ago.

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Classic Fries #40: Human Code & Medication Wars

RJ45 — Sat, 13 Oct 2007 01:00:00 -0400

This is the 40th edition! Wow! Well, today we are going to put a favorite quick bit of mine from RJ-NET.BLOG called "Human Code." But wait, that isn't all! Since it is a short bit and this is the 40th edition, I am throwing in another bit about human behavior, "The Medication War."

Enjoy!

HUMAN CODE

People always use these phrases to sugar coat something, where we basically try to kid ourselves. Some people can call it wisdom and a sign of maturity. Personally, I call it bullshit.

"It doesn't matter if you win or lose, it is how you play the game" = You suck, get over it!

"Everyone is entitled to their own opinion" = You are a fucking moron!

Daily Articles

Classic Fries #39: Christopher Reeve & Dick Jokes

RJ45 — Sun, 07 Oct 2007 02:28:11 -0400

However, it is Sunday today! Since we ALWAYS have the original Would You Like Fries With That? on the 6th, I just went ahead and bumped Classic Fries to today.

We are getting treated to some of the original stuff that inspired Free Floating Hostility. During RJ-NET.BLOG, I went ahead and went with a new WYLFWT? column called The Uncanny Would You Like Fries With That? While there were only 4 editions, they were great, in my opinion. So without further ado, here is The Uncanny Would You Like Fries With That? #3 - "Let the Hostility Continue!"

The Mother Ship of The Blog

#3 - "Let the Hostility Continue!"

Welcome to the mothership everybody! Your favorite Richard Jackson is here with more complete and utter randomness. Hey, I love my free-floating hostility.

Daily Articles

Classic Fries #38: The Bad Boss

brynna — Sat, 29 Sep 2007 09:08:33 -0400

Last week, The Pick had his turn, and now it is time for Brynna to discuss one thing eveybody has at least once, the Bad Boss. The kind of boss that turns Medusa into stone.

Now here is "Rant on Being Speechless"...

Like most females, I have a fondness for using the spoken word. In other words, I'm talkative. Combine that with the fact that I use my voice for a living and you can imagine the strain my vocal cords take on a day-to-day basis. Because of that alone I've taken extra care of my pipes and have a vanity as to how they sound over the phone. Yes, I'm proud of the marriage proposals, the comments as to how sexy I sound, and the flirting I'm on the receiving end of throughout my work day.

Until two weeks ago.

Daily Articles

Classic Fries #37: Warning Labels

ThePick — Sat, 22 Sep 2007 04:00:00 -0400

This week, we head back to RJ-NET.BLOG to get something from The Pick! He rights a little bit about warning labels on prescriptions.

You've got The Pick, and here's the skinny:

Stuff like this makes me want to kill myself...

All antidepressants (search) must carry a "black box" warning, the government's strongest safety alert, linking the drugs to increased suicidal thoughts and behavior among children and teens taking them, the Food and Drug Administration said Friday.

Daily Articles

Classic Fries #36: Taxes

RJ45 — Sat, 15 Sep 2007 13:41:57 -0400

This week, we are dipping into the And Your Point Being? archives again. This is about something we can all relate to... taxes. Originally posted on October 8, 2004, here is ... ..And Your Point #9 - "THAT'S IT!"

..And Your Point #10- "THAT'S IT!" 10.08.2004

...And Your Point Being?

#10 - That's It!

Okay, yesterday at work was payday and I finally have HAD IT! My paycheck could have made $1024 ...but then it was trimmed down by the government to $788. Now I could just not pay my taxes, but that is against the law. The last thing I need is the executive branch of the government on my ass. So I have decided what I am going to do.

I AM GOING TO TAX THE GOVERNMENT!!!!!

Daily Articles

Classic Fries #35: Post 9/11

RJ45 — Sat, 08 Sep 2007 02:48:37 -0400

It has been six years since that awful awful day. The day after the September 11 attacks, a lot of people said a lot of things, including me. So, here it is, Would You Like Fries With That? #504 posted on September 12, 2007.

WYLFWT? #504

"It's been awhile since I have gone and f*cked things up, just like I always do..." - "It's Been Awhile" by Staind

What do I write about today? Unless you have been living in a cave on Mars with your eyes shut and your ears plugged, you know what has happened today. It's just something I can't get out of my head, no matter how much I try. So I felt like I should write about it and express myself, maybe that will help it a little.

Daily Articles

Classic Fries #34: More Tech Support Nightmares

RJ45 — Sat, 01 Sep 2007 02:26:10 -0400

Back in 2004, during the days of RJ-NET.BLOG, I had started my job as a tech support rep. I had some pretty unbelievable stories of stupidity. THIS IS ONE OF THEM!

TALES..
.
FROM A CALL CENTER!!!

#2 - "I (Say Your Name)"

Hey everybody, and welcome to the second edition of TALES...From a Call Center!!!

As you may know, I work in a call center for a broadband ISP. We all hear horror stories, and the stories of how stupid your average American is in this day and age. However, you don't really know until you put on that headset.

Daily Articles

Classic Fries #33: A Day in the Life

RJ45 — Sat, 25 Aug 2007 02:31:27 -0400

Back in 2002, I decided to end my 4 year run of the original WYLFWT? column to start a new one... A Day in the Life. The writing was a lot more mature and the whole idea was for me to retire all of my old material so I could finally continue on. The first two years also document my journey as I sort of went through a spiritual rebirth and fell in love with with my soon to be wife, Katie.

Every since then, I bust out ADITL at least once or twice a year. THIS is the first edition.

A Day in the Life #1 - December 6, 2002

Welcome everybody the first edition ever of my brand new newsletter, A Day in the Life. I welcome those readers who decided to stick by me and support as everything changes. To the new readers, I welcome you on this wonderful journey that is my new life.

Daily Articles

Classic Fries #32: Phrases and Responses

RJ45 — Sat, 18 Aug 2007 08:12:50 -0400

This edition, I am bringing back from the A Day in the Life-era. It is just some rants about phrases and reactions that bothered me! Enjoy!

A Day in the Life #10 - December 17, 2002

Welcome to another edition of A Day in the Life. I am your host...the man, the myth, the legend...RJ45. How is everybody out there? I am doing really good. I have a great time yesterday with my friends as Applebees. I want...no I DEMAND that we all hang out again.

I know yesterday I said I was going to talk about my dreams, but you know what? I CHANGED MY MIND. Today I am going to be talking about the way we react to things as people. So enjoy!

Daily Articles

Classic Fries #31: HYGIENE ESPIONAGE

RJ45 — Sat, 04 Aug 2007 09:15:10 -0400

This week, we get something that wasn't posted before and is in the "Unpublished Writing" section.

Being 20 at the time, I never had the experience of what all married men get...buying hygiene products for your girlfriend/fiance/wife. I love her, so I didn’t have a problem with it. However, that first time, I treated it as an espionage mission. That inspired this piece. I almost had this finished back in October, but I never got around to finishing it. The ending seems rushed because I just now wrote a quick ending. Right up until those last two rushed paragraphs, this is a great read.

Before anyone gets onto me... I am much more mature now and it isn't a big deal for me. I love her, okay?! :-)

Daily Articles

Classic Fries #30: Impeach Bush

FlareHolyMeteo — Sat, 28 Jul 2007 02:42:09 -0400

Well, I lied, this one isn't from the museum. However, it is an awesome leftover from a concept from last year where FlareHolyMeteo and The Pick were going to debate. The series of articles were to be called: Clash of the Titans. However, no one really had the time to keep it up, but FlareHolyMeteo did get in his opening arguments on the second debate. I saved it wondering what to do, and then I decided to just print it here in Classic Fries! Hell, anyone can take the other side and perhaps continue this debate if they'd like. ;-)

So, here is the outtake from the opening arguments of the failed Clash of the Titans #2: "Impeach George Bush"...

Daily Articles

Classic Fries #29: One Model Place

Avianna — Sat, 21 Jul 2007 02:20:47 -0400

EmmyLouAngel.wylfwt.com is closing its doors soon, unfortunately. Too much for both Emmy and RJ45 to manage and half of the website has been broken since last November. However, instead of wasting the material, WYLFWT.com will be incorporating it in its vast archives!

This week, Emmy discusses some of the troubles running into being a model and advertising on the web. Originally posted on August 5, 2006... here is "OMP - OMG!!"

So I signed up for this website called OMP (One Model Place) where you can set up a modeling/acting profile and there is other profiles for agents and photographs. The point is its kinda like a Help Wanted site. If someone wants to get a model, they can look you up by look, location, and what kind of work you do.

Daily Articles

Classic Fries #28: Snakes & Planes

Avianna — Sat, 14 Jul 2007 02:06:19 -0400

Remember the big Snakes on a Plane craze that lasted eight seconds? Well, this is a very quick write-up of the first impressions movie from the beautiful Emmy, and you get some pictures of the costume she wore to the premiere as well!

Sooooo... Snakes on a Plane. Snakes on a Plane... Hmm... what to say about Snakes on a plane... other then... marvelous! The most cheesey stupid jumpy fictional action movie I have ever seen. And it has Samual L. Jackson... it doesn't get much better then that.

Daily Articles

Classic Fries #27: GenCon 2006

Melancton — Sat, 07 Jul 2007 02:52:24 -0400

GenCon Indy 2007 is just a little bit more than one month away! WYLFWT.com Team Members 5iN and EmmyLouAngel are already planning to attend the event, and I am sure one of them would be more than happy to report the situation. Last year, EmmyLouAngel gave us the scoop on GenCon 2006, and that is what this edition of Classic Fries will cover!

So, without further ado, originally posted on EmmyLouAngel on August 21, 2006... here is "GenCon: The Article."

Daily Articles

Classic Fries #26: Hot Explicit Sex!

RJ45 — Sat, 23 Jun 2007 02:53:37 -0400

This edition is a fun one. I make fun of porn text advertisements. Lots of innuendo and what not. I would like to possibly revive this column some day as it was always fun to write. This was also posted on the exact of when my fiancé and I became an item, so it is double special to me!

So, originally posted on December 8, 2002... Here is A Day in the Life #3: "Hot Explicit Sex!"

A Day in the Life #3 - December 8, 2002

Welcome to another edition of the hippest, coolest, and most gnarly newsletter out there...A Day in the Life. Okay, so maybe my newsletter isn't that, but you got to admit it does kick ass a little bit. Christmas is almost here, and so far life has been good. It's like this is opposite winter or something.

Daily Articles

Classic Fries #25: The Satire Newspaper #2

RJ45 — Sat, 16 Jun 2007 02:46:47 -0400

When it comes to a satire newspaper, The Onion has that market. I will admit it for the rest of my life. However, that doesn't mean I can't give it a shot! In fact, I am sure many are incline to agree that the True Psycho Phreak Products advertisements are pretty damn good.

When I started off the And Your Point Being? column, I started off with The AYPB? Tribune. It is a parody newspaper with my own satirical stories. The two editions that I posted were well received. I have wanted to pick up where I left off in AYPB?, and even tried writing The AYPB Tribune v2 #1, but it didn't do to well since I had going writer's block when writing it...and basically spat out crap. However, I do plan on taking on that task again, someday.

Daily Articles

Classic Fries

Sonic the Hedgehog 3: The Review

Review of Royal Rumble 1992

Royal Rumble 1992

A Poem For RJ45's Fiancee

TODAY: I AM GETTING MARRIED! YEEAAAHHH!!

-- A Day in the Life #100 -- Eight Crazy Nights - Night Eight --

I Remember by RJ-45

The Evolution of Shining Force

Some Dumb Song Parodies

Brief History of the Famicon Disk System

A Rant on the Department of Motor Vehicles

Brief History of the Arcades

Brief History of the Atari 7800

Top 10 Mario Games (as of 2003)

Wrestlemania X-Seven Review

Wrestlemania X-Seven

Have You Ever Wondered?

The Original True Psycho Phreak Products #1

#98 May 20, 1999: The BOX

Classic Rants #4

Classic Rants #3

Classic Rants #2

Classic Rants #1

#349 Jan 25, 2000: The Possessed Broom!

Condoms, AIDS, Ribbons, Valentine's Day Snack Cakes, and President's Day

Internet Rants of Yesteryear 2

NVIATWS: Naked Vickie In A Temple With a Sword

Dumb Warning Labels

THE "S" IN ILLINOIS LAW

THE "S" IN ILLINOIS LAW

News Stories That Give Society a Reality Check

The New Year: So bad, its good?

I <3 Christmas

Complete Randomness

News Predictions for the Year 2004

Easily Entertained

Sonic CD: The Review

The Number Three SOCOM Player In The World

Internet Rants of Yesteryear

Call Center Tales: Crossing the Line into Insanity

People Just Don't Have Common Sense

Classic Fries #41: Super-Teddy: The Last Cub of Krypton

The Legend of Super-Teddy

The Last Cub of Krypton

Classic Fries #40: Human Code & Medication Wars

Classic Fries #39: Christopher Reeve & Dick Jokes

Classic Fries #38: The Bad Boss

Classic Fries #37: Warning Labels

Classic Fries #36: Taxes

Classic Fries #35: Post 9/11

Classic Fries #34: More Tech Support Nightmares

Classic Fries #33: A Day in the Life

Classic Fries #32: Phrases and Responses

Classic Fries #31: HYGIENE ESPIONAGE

Classic Fries #30: Impeach Bush

Classic Fries #29: One Model Place

Classic Fries #28: Snakes & Planes

Classic Fries #27: GenCon 2006

Classic Fries #26: Hot Explicit Sex!

Classic Fries #25: The Satire Newspaper #2

-- A Day in the Life #100
-- Eight Crazy Nights - Night Eight --

I Remember
by RJ-45