Complaints and Greivances 2

Dear Capital One;

If you suspect someone stole my credit card due to multiple purchases of the same item the correct thing to do is not freeze my card without telling me, but to call me and ask me!

I don't think I should have to call you to find out why my card was declined at a gas station.

Also Ms. "Well you're probably over your limit!" I hope you enjoyed that big ol' piece of humble pie you got to eat when you saw I was no where close to being over my limit.

I respect that you feel strongly about your faith and you want to share it. Good for you for finding something you so passionately believe in that you think everyone can benefit from it.

However, when I don't undo the chain lock from my door, and stare at you blankly as you wave your bright orange bible in my face, that's a good sign I'm not interested.

When I tell you I'm not interested? Shut up, and move on. Seriously, it's better that way. It leaves people either feeling indifferent or with a slightly positive attitude toward you and your faith. Instead, you leave people thinking you're an annoying bunch of people and the whole reason they don't worship what you do.

Also, coming back to slide a magazine under my door? Not cool boo-boo. Why yes, I slid it right back out. I heard you scoff and pick it up. I'm saving your church money by not simply throwing an unread magazine away, take your magazine and move on.

We pay an extra $50 for rent than we would to live across the street. Why? Because we're a secure building and they are not. So why for the love of cheese would you simply hit "Open Door" when your buzzer randomly rings?

There is a fancy thing called The Intercom. You press "Talk Now" (that'd be the button next to Open Door) and ask who is buzzing you. I don't care if you ordered Chinese food and think it's the delivery man, ask who the freak it is!

Because of someone in this building we've had sales men and religious people knocking at our door damn near every day. I am not impressed. I hope the bible people took up a good hour of your time preaching a religion you not only don't follow but find offensive, you deserve it.

Get the fuck off TV, seriously.

So I'm being forced to watch Nancy Grace earlier in the evening because the remote is over there =====> and Adrian is feeding over here. She is talking about the horrific event that was the Omaha Westroads Mall shooting. She wasn't getting on my nerves to bad until she asked,

"Do you think if President Bush wasn't in town the police would have made it across town faster?"

OK can someone get this bitch a map? They made it in six minutes! Clearly someone has never had to call the police, have they Ms. Grace. Learn yourself some facts before you open your mouth. Oh wait, that won't happen. Ever.

Not only did you fail to confuse me, or annoy me, I would have LOVED to see the look on your face when I corrected your grammatical error.

Seriously, who is teaching these kids how to prank now days?

Man... I was a master pranker back in the day. None of that "Is your refrigerator running?" crap either. Oh no. My best prank ever was convincing a woman that I was with the police department and that her husband was in jail for streaking. She had to come and get him because he was drunk and couldn't remember what he had done with his clothes, so he was sitting in a holding cell naked. I bet she looked like a damn fool walking into the police station to get her supposable drunk and naked husband.