Will Give Shirt For Gas - A New Ridiculous Solution To Our Gas Price Crisis!

DISCLAIMER: Yes, this is a product placement article, and, yes, I do feel dirty all over. I've had writer's block and this was my only inspiration I have had in days, so I'm going with it.

So one of the biggest issues in America (and all over the world, for that matter) is the price of gas. It is official, folks! "How is the weather?" and "How about them Cubbies?" has now officially changed over to "How about those gas prices?"

That is at least until Global Warming fries us all or the Cubs win the World Series, THEN it will be going back to "How is the weather?" and "How about them Cubbies?" Chances are, they'll probably both happen around the same time.

According to USA Today, drivers have cut back on their driving by THIRTY BILLION MILES. That is the same amount of driving we did in 2005, only then we had 8 million less people. So, what a layman could come to the conclusion of is that we have cut back our fuel usage by 8 MILLION PEOPLE. That's the size of four Chicagos!

Basically, we said "Okay, well fuck you, we just won't drive."

I mean, I got a backyard, a computer, and a cell phone that can do just about everything but jack me off, I should be fine.

Apparently, oil companies and transportation are coming up short in the revenue department as the result of both rising prices of crude oil and Americans not driving as much (REALLY?!).

I have heard some solutions to the problem. Some sensible. Many ridiculous.

My favorite ridiculous solution that USA Today cited is to maybe charge more on tolls. Yeah, that's OBVIOUSLY the solution to go with. Make us pay more money that we already don't have so we can continue not to travel as often. Makes perfect sense to me!

So, I have, in turn, come up with a ridiculous solution for gas prices...

Yup, my ridiculous solution is a shirt! Look at it this way, you spend $20 on a t-shirt, and you just might get $40 to $50 in free gas from someone who actually has the money to spend and just wants the shirt off your back. Then in turn, they get to pass the shirt along. You can start a whole trend!

If you are a guy with a six pack or a gal with a nice rack, passing this shirt along shouldn't be a problem. Although women, be sure to at least wear a bra underneath so you don't get arrested... cause that'll cost
a lot more than a tank of gas.

If you are someone without any dignity, it also shouldn't be a problem. Especially if the person donating gas to you likes to see people sell themselves out for practically nothing!

So quit being a part of the problem, and be a part of the solution! Get your "Will Give Shirt For Gas" shirt today. Comes in over two dozen different varieties!

http://www.cafepress.com/giveshirt4gas

RJ45 trying to clean himself from writing this shill... STILL NOT CLEAN! STILL NOT CLEAN!