Ridiculous Real Phobias, A through Z: B

Welcome to a series by yours truly called "Ridiculous Real Phobias, A - Z." Over the next few months, I will be going over the phobias, and running down my favorites from A through Z. I will provide a quick analysis, and suggest a practical joke for everyone to run with.

Check out previous editions: A

Now, without further ado, let us continue with the letter B!

Bibliophobia- Fear of books.

   RJ45's Analysis: Quite often confused with dyslexia...

   Practical Joke: You need to inject them with a sedative so they will pass out. Then, chain them up to the wall of a library.


Bolshephobia- Fear of Bolsheviks.

   RJ45's Analysis: Soviet Unite! Gather together as you area all very relevant in today's society and scare the piss out of these Bolshephobes!

   Practical Joke: Talk about the Cold War...

Barophobia - Fear of gravity.

   RJ45's Analysis: I tell you, nothing scares the crap out of me more than GRAVITY! Personally, I would much rather live on the moon. That way we can float endlessly in space and die that way instead!

   Practical Joke: Drug them and then hang them by their pants off of the edge of a cliff!


Basophobia - Fear of walking.

   RJ45's Analysis: How much are you willing to bet that someone, someday said "I am not lazy, I have basophobia! I can't help it!"

   Practical Joke: Sign them up for the Race for a Cure and other mile walk charity events!

Bathophobia - Fear of depth.

   RJ45's Analysis: Also sometimes known as George Bush Personality Defecit Disorder..

   Practical Joke: If male, stick them with a really old prostitute. If female, bring in a porno star.

Batrachophobia- Fear of amphibians, such as frogs, newts, salamanders, etc.

   RJ45's Analysis: DAMN NEWTS!

   Practical Joke: Sign them up for Fear Factor


Botanophobia- Fear of plants.

   RJ45's Analysis: What the fuck? Who goes "AHHHHH!!! GET IT AWAY! GET THE ROSE AWAY FROM ME! AHHH! SO SCARY!"

   Practical Joke: TWO WORDS...

HEDGE MAZE!

Bromidrosiphobia - Fear of body smells.

   RJ45's Analysis: Now let me ask you this... who likes body smells? Hell, I am afraid of having B.O. every day... so, I really don't see this as a phobia as more than something we all fear and hate!

   Practical Joke: Get a whole bunch of nekkid sweaty people in their room with the heat turned up to 85. That should suffice.


Bogyphobia- Fear of bogeys or the bogeyman.

   RJ45's Analysis: BOOGEYMAN!

Bart, I don't mean to alarm you, but there might be a Boogeyman or Boogeymen in the house.

   Oh wait, Bogeys? What the fuck is The Bogeyman?

   Practical Joke: I don't know. Tell me what The Bogeyman is first...

RJ45