Freaky Reviews From Energy Drink Fiends

I've never really been into the energy drink thing too much. Why? For one, the majority of them taste worse than Robitussin. Second, for as shitty as they taste, they are horrible expensive. Third, many of them can have pretty bad side effects. I mean, your body isn't meant to get Energy out of a can. I'm a caffeine addict myself, and some of these drinks kind of scare me cause I've heard reports of people going to the hospital and such. Sheesh!

Now, I am not saying I am dietition, a personal trainer, or a doctor by any stretch. Let us face it, it doesn't take a doctor to realize that there is no such thing as a subsitute for sleep.

Having an occasional energy drink on exam days or more recently, in my case, doing wedding planning till late at night, is at least understandable. Maybe not condonable, but one can understand how you got there.

For instance, the other day after a long night of sorting through so much crap, I got like 5 hours of sleep, which my norm is 8. I decided to pick up the Chaser 5 Hour Energy Shot. I figured "Hey, its only 2 ounces, so if it tastes like crap, I don't have to endure an entire can."

After a couple of small sips though, I felt my heart getting ready to race on me. I threw the rest of that shit in the garbage before more damage was done.

So, I visited this website: http://www.screamingenergy.com/

I checked into reviews of this drink and many people have experienced the same thing, only when they chugged the bottle, they ended up in the hospital. However, no problems were found and they returned to normal as if nothing happened.

WHOOPS.

Thank goodness I stopped while I was ahead. My future wife would have kicked my ass after I got better.

However, looking through the website, I couldn't help but read some of the insane reviews people wrote. Here are my personal favorites!

---

REVIEW #1:

CamraMaan on 2007-12-13 00:07:53 said:
I take one of these every morning, either when my alarm first goes off (I usually hit snooze twice), or once I get to the store if I forgot to stock up. If I take one when I first wake up, and go back to sleep through two snoozes (15 minutes), I wake up at the next alarm totally wide eyed and awake. If I take one at the gas station, I'm awake within 5 minutes. For me I don't get any shakes, or anything you might expect from a powerful energy drink like this, it just wakes me up... totally awake. Even works perfectly on 3 hours of sleep after getting 5 hours of sleep each of the previous two nights! Thats where the real test is! The price isn't "cheap", but come on, you get totally awake for $3... most espresso drinks are more than that, don't last as long, and you also crash. I'm all too willing to pay the $3! And the taste isn't fantastic, but if you take one of these every day, it'll grow on you quickly. I'd give it a 9.5, simply because I like an energy shot that works this well, with no hyper side effects (for me). I've bought a couple cases in the past, and the prices are worth it for what you get, even if you buy by the bottle.

COMMENTARY: Jesus fucking Christ, dude! If you have to take an energy drink like that every morning, but you snooze first, maybe this whole energy drink selection isn't exactly your biggest problem.

My personal suggestion is to get some damn sleep. Take that money you are blowing on those energy drinks, and use it for something like a 0.8132 gallons of gas you can buy with those $3!

REVIEW #2:

Peyton on 2008-01-30 12:43:22 said:
Yo, I drink like 3 red bulls a day so bad for you I gained like 10 pounds. So I switched to this thing. It’s crazy, like taking an adderall. Very good I love this thing I am going to start substituting this for my red bulls. Only 1 a day not 3.

COMMENTARY: 3 Red Bulls a Day? What the fuck?!

---

REVIEW #1:

Matt RoXX on 2007-12-22 10:26:28 said:
this drink is by far the best thing ive had in forever. The first time i had it, I opened it, it sounded quite like a gunshot almost, so i was like, yeeah. thats power. and, i took 2 sips, and geez! i was on the biggest energy rush! like, so much that you could punch me in the face, and i wouldnt feel it. and i still had the entire can to drink! This is hands down the best drink ever at a great value. in my opinion.

COMMENTARY: Sweet, does this mean that we can all punch you in the face!

REVIEW #2:

Andrew on 2008-02-27 13:07:00 said:
this is the best energy drink that i have had in my entire life a slice of heaven. Magic in a drink taste like a mountain of creamy soft freshness

COMMENTARY: I think I am probably the only idiot thinking "RIIICCOOOLLLAAA!!"

---

REVIEW:

newcomb, nm on 2008-03-12 12:30:23 said:
i love Rockstar it's all i can say. I have at least 3 everyday. SCREW EVERYONE THAT DOESN'T LIKE IT, AND EVERYONE WHO IS TRYING TO GET RID OF IT( ESPECIALLY THE SCHOOL DISTRICT)!

COMMENTARY: Yeah, you just don't understand! This drink makes love to me in ways you could never understand! It makes me feel like a maaaaaaaaan.

---

In conclusion, this is just some of the craziness I found. Feel free to check that site out and browse around the craziness of it all.

If you think I have something against energy drink fiends, I don't. Many of my best friends are energy drink fiends. Ultimately, I don't give a shit. Its your body. Just be careful! :-)

Love,

RJ45